No Plot One-Shots
by Trmpetplaya1
Summary: I've added to my collection of short, hilariously funny, (Kazuri: Isn't that redundant? TP1: Shut up, muse!!) itsy-bitsy, one-shots! Chap. 2 is up! I've MS Wordified most of the characters' names. What's MS Wordified? Read and find out! ^_^
1. Random Craziness and RPBCs... o.O

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Gundam Wing, the Yankees, Gundamium Alloy, cookies, or Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I do own a really bad keyboard *holds up a really old and crumb-filled keyboard* Anyone up for a trade? Anyone?

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~1~ Oh so annoying…

Wufei: Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet? Am I annoying yet?

Heero: No.

Wufei: INJUSTICE!! *stalks off to find someone else to annoy*

Heero: Hn. *smiles a bit*

~2~ 

Trowa: *looks around nervously*…*after double checking the dark hallway he brings his hand up above his head and-*

Duo: AHA!! Caught you! 

Trowa: ……*sigh*……

Duo: So THAT'S why it's so hard! *raps his hand against Trowa's half painted hair* It's made of _Gundamium Alloy!_

Trowa: Just don't tell anyone else, okay?

Duo: Oh, you can trust me, buddy old pal…*snickers*

Trowa: *sigh*

Duo: *walks off leaving Trowa to finish painting his, erm, 'hair'**muttering* Hm…I wonder if Heero has a skull of Gundamium Alloy…

Trowa:……

~3~

Umpire: STI-RIKE TWO!!! STIIII-RIKE THREE!! YER OUT!!

Wufei: INJUSTICE!! *breaks bat over his knee* Why did we agree to play with those bakana onnas, anyway?!

Quatre: Well, you DID challenge them…

Wufei:…

Trowa: Hey, that's my line.

Hilde: *walks in from the outfield* Three outs, boys! Let's see…the score's…*thinks* 43-1! Our turn at bat! 

Dorothy: *comes in from 1st* You guys ready to give up yet?

Heero: …

Trowa:……

Quatre: Ummm…*looks nervously at the rest of the guys*

Duo: Sure! Anyone up for pizza?

Wufei: NO!! I will NOT be beaten by onnas!! *stomps defiantly into outfield*

All others: *sweatdrop*

~4~

Heero: So…

Trowa: So…

Heero: So……

Trowa: So……

Heero: So………

Trowa: So………

Heero: So…………

Trowa: So…………

Heero: So……………how 'bout them Yankees?

Trowa: *sweatdrop*

~5~

Duo: Heh heh heh…*sneaks into the kitchen**looks around to see if anyone's watching, then approaches the jar labeled "Cookies"* Yes! The last chocolate chip cookie is mine! *opens cookie jar**a gun comes out pointed right at his face*

Heero: *muffled* Omae o korosu.

Duo: Eh? *glances down into the jar* Heero? How'd you get in there?

Heero: *still muffled* Do not ask useless questions!! The last cookie is mine, MINE!! *starts laughing maniacally* 

Duo: *backs away from the jar slowly*

Heero: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!

~6~ How Gundam Pilot Heero Yuy Eats a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup…

Heero walks up to the Peanut Butter Cup, whips out his gun, and fires and the edge. It ricochets off all four walls several times before heading straight at him. He opens his mouth at the last possible second and chews and swallows.

Heero: Hn. *slight smile*

~7~ How Gundam Pilot Duo Maxwell Eats a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup…

We see the PBC in a nice little crystal dish sitting on a nice little table in a nice little room. Suddenly, a whirlwind fills the room, accompanied by paper, various bits of metal, and cows, what have you. When the chaos clears, the PBC is gone and the nice little dish, table and room are broken/in array. Far off in the distance a sound erupts…

Duo: SUGARSUGARSUGARSUGARSUGAR!!!!!!!! ^______^

~8~ HGP Trowa Barton EARPBC…(AN-*sigh* I'm so lazy…)

Once again, the PBC is on a tray on a table in a room. Trowa approaches it, hands in pockets as usual. He circles it lazily, calculating the weight, height, etc. etc. and then calmly reaches over and picks it up.

Trowa: *eats it normally* Hmmm…not bad. *calmly walks out of the room*

(AN-And you were expecting…? Audience: *sweatdrop*)

~9~ HGP Quatre Raberba Winner EARPBC…

Yet again, we see the PBC on that same tray on that same table in the same room. *sigh* Anyway, Quatre appears in the room (courtesy of yours truly ^_^) and, seeing the PBC, walks towards it, a happy grin on his face. He reaches for it and it about to pick it up when…

Quatre: Bad Quatre! Think of all the fats and calories and sugars and who knows what other unhealthy stuff is in this little circle of chocolate and artificial peanut butter! No! I must not consume it! *walks away from the PBC* But…*turns back around* I do love Reese's…No! I cannot! *walks away again* But…*turns around again* It is soooooo yummytomytummy looking!! *almost makes it to the table* Baka! *slaps himself* DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY BAD THINGS ARE IN THERE?!? Think about what you're doing!! *walks away…_again_* But…*turns around…AGAIN**goes into Zero Mode™* I see many futures that I could select from; which will happen I know not. But you…*turns and picks up the PBC**glares at it* your future is all too clear. *eats the PBC**normal mode* Yum! Happy Quatre!! ^-^

~10~ HGP Wufei Chang EARPBC…(AN-last one…finally…)

You know the drill: same stinkin' PBC on the same stinkin' table in the same stinkin' room…

[Kazuri: Well, technically it's not the 'same stinkin' PBC', unless Q-man spit it up or something like that…

TP1: Did I ask for your help?! 

Kazuri: Nope! It's all part of being a muse; offering demeaning advice whenever we can! ^_^

TP1: Meh…]

Anyway, back to Wuffles-chan…*disregard the deathglare being shot at her by the said pilot* Wufei appears in the room and approaches the PBC, katana drawn.

Wufei: So…you, a weak baka PBC dare challenge me?

PBC:……

Wufei: Silent eh? *circling PBC* Well, I'll soon change that! Speak, imbecile!!

PBC:……

Wufei: I told you to speak!! Obey or face the consequences!!!

PBC:……

Wufei: INJUSTICE!! *slices the PBC up into little pieces (TP1: Reese's Pieces!! ^_^ Kazuri: Oy…)

Little Pieces of the PBC: ………

Wufei: AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! *runs from the room*

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~Author's Notes~

Well, did you like it? Should I continue, or send this into the trash with my other rejects? *points to an overflowing bin labeled 'Rejects'* Let me know in your review, onegai!! 

Wufei: I was defeated by a weak Peanut Butter Cup…I am the epitome of weakness…*sniffles*

TP1: There, there, Wuffie-chan…*pats him sympathetically on the back* It'll be okay…

Wufei: *sniff* Thanks…

TP1: *behind his back* Hehe, he has no idea what I plan to do next…

Wufei: Nani?

TP1: *innocently* Oh, nothing…

Anyway, comments, questions, praise *cough cough*, and any other forgotten things can be submitted in review form or at my e-mail address: trmpetgrl1@icqmail.com 

Ja ne, Minna-san!!!

~Trmpetplaya1


	2. Gundam Wing...MS Word-ified!! ^_^

Okay, this next bunch of 'No Plot One Shots' were inspired by none other than…*drumroll* Microsoft Word's Spell Check!! -_-() Oy…anyway, after having tons of little squiggly red lines under all the pilot's and their acquaintances names, I decided to see what spelling suggestions our little MS word had for them. This is what I've come up with! (I've only used the funny ones) Have fun!!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Gundam Wing *pouts* or evilevilevilevil Microsoft Word. _ Bill Gates, you're goin' down!! *sends Wufei after him*

~11~ Quadra Reverb?

**Quatre Raberba Winner:** Quartet, Quarto, Quattro, Quitter, Quire, Quadra / Roberta, Rivera, Rubber, Reverb

Quatre: I'm a square frame or border that echoes? o.O

Duo: Hehehe…

~12~ Heron Yoyo?!

**Heero Yuy:** Heron, Hereof, Here, Hero / Buy, Yoyo, Guy, Yom, Yet, Your

Heero: I'm a birdie with yoyos!! *does little flap-the-arms thingy*

Everyone Else: *backs away slowly*

~13~ Woofer Fief!!

**Wufei (Wu Fei) Chang:** Wife (TP1: Teeheehee…), Woofer, Wafer, Woofed / ['Wu' was fine] / Fein, Fief, Fen, Fez, Fay / ['Chang' was normal, too]

Wufei: INJUSTICE!! I refuse to be called 'Wife'!! *goes off to kill Microsoft Word*

Duo: *looking in dictionary* Woofer Fief…Woofer Fie-AHA!! 'A high-fidelity loudspeaker for reproducing sounds below the treble register' and…'a territory held in fee.' *blink blink* Okay, the 'Wife' one was funnier…

Everyone Else: *nod nod*

~14~ Troas Barton?

**Trowa Barton:** Trowel, Throw, Troas, Tarawa, Trojan (TP1: NO!! You ECCHI!!! _), Rowan, Tower / [no spelling suggestions for Barton]

Trowa:……

Duo: *whining* Hee-chan…I can't find 'Troas' in the dictionary!

Heero: *grabs dictionary from Duo*……Hn.

TP1: *whispers to audience* That means he can't find it, either…

Heero: *deathglare*

~15~ Normal, eh?

**Duo Maxwell:** [normal as normal can be]

Duo: Ha! Beat THAT you guys!!

Duet: Hmm…

~16~ Normal…again…

**Duet Maxine:** [normal, according to MS Word]

TP1: *out of corner of mouth* And ONLY according to MS Word…

Duet: I HEARD THAT!! *starts chasing after her w/ her own mallet*

TP1: *running* Heh heh heh…now, Duet-chan…put down my mall-AAAAHHHHH!!!

Duet: *swinging at TP1-dono*

~17~ Reliant Dorian…?

**Relena Dorlian (Peacecraft):** Relent, (more like 'RelentLESS'…) Elena, Reline, Helena, Reliant, Rexene (o.O), Relined / Dorian (duh…), Durian, Dorland, Dorling / Peace Craft

Relena: I'm a reliant war-like Hellenic person from the 1100's BC that put an end to the Mycenaean culture!! ^_^ *thinks* Hey…wait a minute…

Everyone Else: *facevaults*

~18~ Czechoslovakian Duck, anyone?

**Zechs Merquise/Milliardo Peacecraft:** Zech's, Czechs, Techs / Marquise, Marquises / Millard, Millar do, Mallard / Peace Craft

Zechs: Czechoslovakian DUCK?!

TP1: Yes! From your two first names!

Trowa: *ahem* A mallard is a male _duck_…

Zechs:…I...knew that…

Heero: Sure…

~19~ Media Rune!!

**Midii Une:** (AN - Yes, Midii Une from Trowa's Episode Zero and Colonel/Lady Une ARE the same person/people) Midi, Midis, Media / One, Use, June, Rune, Tune, Dune

Lady Une: HA! Everything I touch will turn to gold!!

TP1: Umm…that's MidUs, not Midis…

Lady Une: Uh, I knew that….

Everyone Else: *sweatdrop*

~20~ Tweeze-sama?

**Treize Khushrenada:** Frieze, Trieste, Tries, Tweeze, Treys, Resize (TP1: o.O), Freeze, Trees / [no spelling suggestions]

Treize: Of course I use tweezers! How else do you think I'd get my eyebrows so wonderfully perfect? *realizes everyone's listening to him* Oh…heh heh…don't mind me…*whistles* ^_^()

Everyone Else: o.O

~21~ Armenia-chan?

**Marimeia Khushrenada:** Macromedia, Marilee, Armenia, Paramecia, Marine, Matrimonial, Marmora, Mermaid, Marimba, Mari Mea / [no spelling suggestions]

Marimeia: I own two countries!!

Duo: *pats her on the head* Sure you do, kid…sure you do…

Marimeia: No! Seriously!!

Duo: *sweatdrop*

AN – 

Sooooooo…did ya like? I was inspired by a Fushigi Yuugi fic of the same nature, where they took the seishi names and MS Word-ified them! (New Word!! YAY!! ^-^) Anyway, PLEASE leave a review and let me know what you think! Suggestions for future chapters are also welcome! ^_^ Thanks for taking the time to read this! Ja ne!!

~Trmpetplaya1 (trmpetgrl1@icqmail.com)

P.S. I know I might've spelled some of the names different than some of y'all are used to. What I did was take the two or three most used spellings of the names (ie: Marimeia, Marimea) and checked both of them. The words were pretty much the same both times, so I figured I'd just use the spellings I was most familiar with. Ja mata, again!!


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